Divorce, more so my story and view on it. In recent situations I feel like I have to write or I'll explode and just air ALL the dirty laundry, which i am trying not to do. I have also had an overwhelming response to what I have already written and how i "get through".So very very tactfully I will write.
I feel when you say " I do" , it's suppose to be forever. In sickness and in health. Til death do you part. Most people think this means physical death. In my situation, it was the death of something else. My marriage. Therefore when someone or something dies, you have to go through a grieving process. In divorce a piece that made you is now dying or dead. An open wound that needs healing. This healing for me is taking a VERY long time. Almost a year now and still not done. Situations keep arising that keep tearing open the wound and making it raw again. Go to's: Crying, Counseling, Rx medication, support system, and wine. Lots of wine!
I was a product of divorce and NEVER wanted my children to be going through that. . It's so important to let myself go and feel every emotion. It's not wrong to be angry or sad. As long as I'm not there for years. But something that made a apart of me , has died. So grieving as stupid as it sounds is vital.
1. Denial and Isolation: This isn't really happening. Everything will be fine and we will get back together after some time apart.
This is just a temporary response that brings us through the first wave of hurt.
2. Anger: Vulnerability is exposed and we feel we are unprepared for what's up ahead. So we start expressing our fear in anger. We resent the person for causing us pain or not getting their act together for their famly. We feel guilt for this anger, and this makes us even more angry.
3. Bargaining: Often trying to regain control
If only we had sought counseling sooner
If only I sought help for myself to make myself a better wife…
If only I had tried harder to make it work